


Bigger They Are, Harder They Fall

by whitchry9



Series: no more vacations, like, ever [7]
Category: Daredevil (Comics), Hawkeye (Comics), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Blind Character, Canon Disabilities, Canon Disabled Character, Deaf Character, Deaf Clint Barton, Friendship, Gen, Humor, Japan, Vacations, at least not without pepper, lipreading, tony is not allowed to go anywhere anymore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-09
Updated: 2015-08-09
Packaged: 2018-04-13 20:56:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4537011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whitchry9/pseuds/whitchry9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They'd never actually invited Tony, which was the way they explained their trip to Japan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bigger They Are, Harder They Fall

**Author's Note:**

> Things in [ ] brackets are things that Clint assumes are being said, because lip reading is never completely accurate. He does have some hearing, and using both, manages to pick up most of what's being said.

In their defense, they never actually invited Tony along. He actually just showed up and told them they'd be going with him.

So if Fury was going to blame anyone for this, it should be Tony.

(And to be fair, he probably would. Clint was fairly certain he blamed Tony for almost everything, whether it was his fault or not. It was just easier that way.)

 

But Tony had all the arrangements made, and within a day of him deciding they'd go to Japan, the three of them found themselves on a plane.

Another one of the perks of Tony deciding he would accompany them was that they got to use one of his multiple private jets. Tony wanted to hire someone to fly it, but Clint declined. He really only trusted Nat to fly him places, and besides, if he wasn't flying, he'd have to sit in the back with Tony and Matt, and he'd heard things about Tony's planes. A lot of things.

No, he'd be just fine flying it.

 

He had no clue what would be in store for them once they got there, but Clint would make sure they got there in one piece.

Oh, if only he knew then.

 

* * *

 

“If I had known Tony motherfucking Stark was going on a vacation with the two of you, I would have revoked his passport, frozen all his accounts, and thrown him in a holding cell,” Fury growled.

Clint exchanged a glance with Matt. Well, he look at Matt and Matt sort of peered in his direction. That wasn't the point. The point was that apparently Tony was a big enough deal that Coulson was no longer qualified to deal with their ventures, which was why Fury was currently berating them for their 'stupid ass decisions'.

 

Clint didn't even have an opportunity to tell him that they didn't want to go anywhere with Tony.

 

* * *

 

“How does it work?” Tony asked, referring to Matt's radar sense. Clint had peeked back at them a couple times, and Tony had been inspecting Matt closely, like the secret would reveal itself if he looked closely enough.

“Not entirely sure,” Matt replied, batting Tony's hand away before it could poke him.

Tony nodded. “Fascinating... Is it influenced by anything? Temperature, ambient noise, stress, exhaustion?”

“Temperature, I don't think so. I mean, I know sound waves travel at different speeds depending on the temperature, but I don't think the effect is large enough for me to notice. Ambient noise, definitely. It depends on my level of focus, but it can be distracting. Same goes for stress and exhaustion I suppose.”

Clint glanced back at them again. Tony was now circling Matt like he was a lioness encircling prey.

He shook his head and turned his attention back to the sky.

“Would you be open to some testing?” Clint heard Tony ask.

Matt chuckled. “Maybe. Depends what you have in mind. I'm fine with observation, but you can't do anything that might affect my senses. They're kind of important to me.”

Tony hummed. “Doable.”

Clint sighed, and shook his head again. Matt was making a big mistake. After Tony had figured out about his hearing loss, he'd taken it upon himself to _fix_ him, like he needed fixing.

 

“ _This isn't the first time Tony,” he'd said, irritated. “I've dealt with hearing loss before just fine without you and your tech.”_

“ _There have been so many breakthroughs in cochlear implant technology in the last few years, and SI is working on a model that blows all the rest out of the water. With one of them, your hearing would be entirely restored.”_

“ _No thanks.”_

_Tony didn't stop. “Why don't you want this Clint? We can fix this.”_

_Clint spun on his heel to face him, no longer intent on simply walking away from this argument. “I am not_ broken, _” he hissed. “There is no fixing this, because to fix something, it needs to be broken. Deaf people are not broken, and you should know that. Just like you're not broken because of that thing in your chest.”_

_He left Tony behind him and stormed off._

 

_Tony showed up later, looking somewhat apologetic, at least as much as he could._

“ _I've reconsidered. SI is going to keep developing the tech, but I'm not going to bother you about it again. I can fix those piece of crap hearing aids that SHIELD gave you though, make them compatible with the coms.”_

_Clint smiled. Giving gifts was Tony's way of apologizing. “That would be great. I've been grounded until they can figure something out, and knowing them, it'll be weeks.”_

_Tony snorted. “Give me a few hours and you'll be good to go.”_

 

Of course, it didn't take him just a few hours. It might have taken him a few hours to make them, but there were even more hours and days of testing and Tony poking and prodding at him and Clint was so done by the end.

The new hearing aids were sort of fucking awesome, but Clint wasn't going to let Tony off so easily after so many hours of suffering.

Matt would have fun, at least.

 

* * *

 

The sky flickered ominously in front of them, and Clint double checked the radar. There wasn't supposed to be any inclement weather on their flight path, but things always changed.

Nope, nothing.

He scratched his head. “Tony, you didn't tell Thor where we were going, did you?”

“No, why?”

“Just thought he might have wanted to come along. It would explain this weather.”

Tony entered the cockpit and looked out the window. “Nope. And as far as I know, Thor was busy doing something with Jane and Darcy this weekend.”

He fiddled with his tablet for a minute. “There shouldn't be anything around here. The skies are clear for 50 miles in all directions. Are you sure you saw something?” He looked up in time to see another lightning bolt light up the sky.

“Oh,” he said.

“Yeah,” Clint agreed.

“I don't know what's going on,” Matt whispered, suddenly right behind them.

Clint jumped in his seat, and Tony nearly fell over.

“Christ, you have to stop doing that Matt,” Tony hissed. “I have a heart condition.”

Matt grinned broadly, and Clint shook his head at him before turning his full attention back to the sky.

“The weather is fucky,” Clint concluded, which was about as much as he could sum it up. “But we're nearly there.”

“That's one thing then,” Matt offered.

“I'm going to climate control the whole world, have I mentioned that yet? I'm just working out some logistics, and fighting a bit with Pepper, but-”

Alarms were going off and Tony and Matt were panicking and then there was an enormous flash and then Clint didn't know what was happening anymore.

 

Then he was in the air, and not in the good way, like inside a plane or even with a parachute, nope, just in the air falling towards his inevitable doom.

“Okay,” Clint said. “This looks bad.”

Matt might have said something. Tony might have said something.

But he couldn't fucking hear them, because in addition to blowing up the plane, the lightning somehow managed to wreck his hearing aids.

Maybe it was because he wasn't wearing the ones Tony had made for him, which were nearly invisible and top of the line. Instead he was wearing the purple ones that he'd grown far too fond of.

If they were wrecked, he was gonna be pissed. (And Nat might actually kill him.)

But there were more pressing concerns.

 

Like the fact that they were falling out of the sky.

Yeah.

 

But Tony was good for something, because his armour zipped right over to him, and he grabbed Clint by one arm, and Matt by the other, slowing their descent. They didn't stop falling, probably cause of the weight limit or something, was there a weight limit? This really wasn't the time to think about it.

 

At least water was softer than land.

Sort of.

It was still like... well, it was like falling from the second story of a building, which Clint had lots of experience with, and wasn't necessarily fatal, but certainly wasn't pleasant, and definitely forced all the air out of his lungs.

 

Clint's head broke the water, and he gasped for air.

“Fuck,” he hissed. “Have I mentioned that I hate water?”

Tony probably said something, because he saw Matt respond.

Clint lifted one hand out of the water, which was a bit of a mistake, because he kind of needed it for treading water.

“Hey guys, deafer than usual over here. Can't read lips through masks. Or... faceplates, whatever,” he added, mostly so Tony wouldn't rant at him, and force him to attempt to decipher it.

Tony put the faceplate of his suit up.

“Please. Even in November, with [ _something_ ] [temperature?], you've got at least two hours [ _something_ ] [falling] unconscious. And I'm sure you've had SHIELD training for [that sort of thing?]. Stop whining.”

Clint grumbled.  
“I haven't,” Matt said. Probably. Made the most sense in the context. He could have also said “Lie heaven,” or any number of other things.

God, Clint hated lip reading sometimes.

“Well, is it going to take two hours to get to the nearest land mass?” Clint snapped. He hadn't really noticed when they were falling, other than the fact that he wasn't going to fall into it, but they weren't exactly near land.

“Give me a [sec],” Tony said, soaring up into the air.

“ _[mumble_ _mumble]_ an idiot [right now]?” Matt asked.

Clint shrugged. He wasn't entirely sure what Matt was asking, but he didn't really want to have to ask him to repeat it. Not yet, when it wasn't that important. Probably.

 

Tony hovered back down near them. He yelled something at Matt, which Clint didn't hear or see, since he didn't come down far enough for Clint to read his lips.

Matt turned to him. “He says it's not far, even carrying [you lazy...] actually [never mind?]. It won't take long. It's [not going] to be [fun?] though.”

He paused, listening to Tony for a minute, probably.

“I'm not [telling him that?]” he muttered.

“What is it?” Clint asked. He didn't like the sounds of that.

“We just have to [make...] that we [don't go too] close to the [air base?]”

“What?” Clint snapped.

Tony waved a hand at him, and Matt shrugged. “He says not to worry,” Matt clarified.

“So reassuring.”

 

Tony spoke to Matt some more, and Clint didn't even bother to try to listen, because ugh. When he finished, Matt turned to him.

“He said that he'll [pull] us [through] the water. But we're going to [have to] hold on [somehow].”

Clint frowned. What were they supposed to hold on to? Tony's boots? They had repulsors on them that kept him upright. Surely they couldn't cling to them. It seemed like Tony's armour didn't have anywhere to cling to. Maybe it was on purpose.

Based on Matt's reaction, Tony said something else, but Matt didn't relay it to him.

Matt just said something else back to Tony.

Clint sighed. “Any time you want to include me...”

Matt turned back to him. “Sorry. Just fighting with Tony about reasonable risk.”

Clint nodded. “Right. Of course. No, wait. I don't think I read that right.” He closed his eyes in the hopes that he when he opened them, he'd be back home and not in the middle of a Japanese sea. “Please tell me I read that wrong.”

 

He hadn't.

 

* * *

 

They ended up clinging to Tony by wrapping themselves around his legs. Like when a child didn't want a parent to leave, and clung on for dear life. Except, it was for dear life.

Tony went slow, but Clint still worried about the skin being peeled from his face. It seemed like ages before he stopped just off the show and let them fall off his legs.

Clint didn't see why he couldn't just drop them on the shore, but apparently he said something that Matt agreed with, because he dropped back into the shallow water.

Clint followed suit, soaking himself just as he was getting dry.

 

They trudged to shore where Tony had landed. Clint tried hard not to shiver, because it just wasn't dignified.

 

Tony stepped out of the armour and it folded down into a suitcase, which he picked up. His suit underneath was perfectly dry. What a jerk. Clint was angry just on principle.

 

“I need new clothes,” Clint muttered, standing there awkwardly, still dripping sea water.

“Right,” Tony said. “Shopping [first then]?”

Matt nodded, and Clint certainly wasn't going to argue.

“And I hate to ask, but can someone [hide me]?” Matt asked.

_No, that didn't make sense. It was probably guide._

Thankfully, Tony took that task on, nudging at Matt's hand with his elbow. He muttered something, shaking his arm off as Matt touched him, presumably with wet hands. Matt probably said something back, because Tony relented, allowing Matt to take his elbow to be led around the bustling streets.

 

Or Clint assumed the streets would be bustling once they made it onto them. Iron Man would draw a few eyes, even if Hawkeye and Daredevil were relatively unknown.

 

* * *

 

Fury snorted. “America's sixth favourite Avenger.”

Clint glared at him, but he knew he'd never out-glare Fury in a contest.

 

* * *

 

Tony had apparently been... wherever they were, before, because he led them through the streets with a practiced ease. Or maybe that sort of thing just came with being a well travelled billionaire who was Iron Man on the side.

 

He took them to a large store, or maybe it was a mall, and led them inside.

 

Clint blinked at the large selection of literally everything, none of which he could understand.

“Hey, Tony, can you read Japanese? Or speak it? Anything? Tell me you have money.”

Tony only smirked at him. “Of course I have money. [In fact] what I have is [better] than money. Plastic!”

Clint rolled his eyes. “Whatever. As long as it can get me some dry clothes and something to eat, I'll be happy.”

Matt nodded. “[Food would be good],” Clint thought he said, although it could have been any sort of variation on those words, since he wasn't facing Clint as he said it. It certainly made the most sense in the context though.

“And as for the language, I dabble.”

Of course he did. At last check, Tony did speak at least five languages that Clint knew about, but Japanese wasn't included. Natasha would know, of course. Clint maintained that she knew everything.

 

They picked up clothes first, because Clint refused to walk around dripping any longer, and Matt just looked super uncomfortable.

Tony muttered at them about their choices, which were probably too cheap for his tastes, but Clint ignored him by turning away and leading Matt to the socks.

Clint really loved novelty socks. He owned pretty much every Avengers one that they made. Far less Hawkeye and Black Widow ones than they made for the other Avengers, but he tried not to take it to heart. (Thor, meanwhile, had taken up a campaign against companies that didn't include Black Widow on merchandise. There were a lot. Natasha assured him it was alright, because she was supposed to be a spy and have secrets, but Thor reminded her of the young warrior maidens who wouldn't have a role model because clothing companies decided that Black Widow was not as profitable as the other Avengers.)

Japan was like the jackpot for novelty socks, and Clint decided he could die happy.

He grabbed two different kinds of Hawkeye socks, three of Black Widow, a new Thor kind he'd never seen before, and one pair featuring Bruce. That's right, not Hulk, but Bruce.

There were also Iron Fist socks, which he picked up because of the continued confusion between the two of them.

 

“Need help with colours?” Clint asked Matt.

“Yeah, maybe,” he replied. “What's this?” he asked, holding out a brightly coloured shirt.

Clint laughed. “Like, fluorescent.”

Matt frowned. “It was [so soft],” he sighed.

Clint was struggling to hold all his socks along with the other clothes he'd gotten, and kind of wanted to hurry Matt along.

“I know buddy, but you'd look like a go go dancer. I can't be seen with you like that.”

He pulled a dark blue shirt off a rack and threw it at Matt. “Try this. Nice dark blue.”

Matt felt it. He nodded.

“Got pants?” Clint asked him.

Matt nodded, holding the bundle in his other hand up. Clint was super thankful that they were a dark grey.

“Great. Need anything else? No, cause I've got enough socks for everyone, so let's find Tony and get something to eat.”

Matt raised an eyebrow and nodded.

 

Tony was waiting by the checkout, with running shoes in their sizes, which was something they'd forgotten. He chatted with the cashier while she scanned their items. In fluent Japanese. Show off.

He took a selfie with her before accepting their bags.

 

Clint and Matt ducked into a nearby washroom (jesus, the toilets were complicated) to get changed into dry clothes.

“What [socks] am I [wearing]?” Matt asked.

Clint glanced at his feet and grinned. Matt had grabbed one of the Black Widow pairs.

“Thor,” he lied.

“Clint,” he warned.

“Black Widow.”

Matt considered his feet and grinned. “I kind of love Nat,” he admitted.

“Me too,” Clint told him. They both put their shoes on, and Clint grabbed another tag off of Matt's clothes that he'd missed. He'd also lost his glasses in the water, and the new pair had a sticker on them.

Clint peeled it off for him.

“Good,” he said. “Let's go get food.”

 

They met Tony again, and led them out of the store. He claimed there was a nearby restaurant that he'd been to before, and was very good.

 

But while they were walking out of the store, and in an entirely different direction than they'd entered, Clint began to smell something.

“Hey, do you guys smell that?”

“Ooh, is that a [food court?]” Tony exclaimed.

Matt sniffed the air. “Not entirely. More [like] a [snack bar?],” he corrected.

“Aw, food court,” Clint sighed, as it came into sight. Matt was right, of course. There were only snacky things, like chips and popcorn and ice cream, all of which he loved, but he was kind of counting on a real meal.

Tony smirked, and signed as he spoke.

“Don't want any popcorn?”

Clint frowned. “Tony, you just used the sign for stripper. I'm assuming you meant popcorn?”

Tony shrugged. “Do you want a stripper?”

Clint only rolled his eyes. “No, I want food. I didn't get to eat on the flight over Tony, unlike some people.”

Tony shrugged. “Okay, we'll get you food. What do you want?”

Clint surveyed his options. There were three exits from the food court, and a number of different food options. His gaze stopped when he came across a booth claiming to have popular Japanese desserts.

“Desserts,” he declared. “Like, all of them.”

Tony grinned. “I can do that.”

 

* * *

 

Fifteen minutes later the three of them had a pile of assorted sweets and were piled on a bench, happily sampling each different kind.

“This is good,” Clint said, a bit surprised. He was eating something that was made out of rice, stuffed with bean paste, which didn't sound all too appetizing, but Tony assured him it would be good.

He also had some sort of sweet roll that was filled with bean paste, a piece of sponge cake, and a melonpan, which was a bun that apparently did not taste like melon, despite its name. Tony had told him you could get ones flavoured like melon, but he decided to stick with the plain one.

Matt had gotten a piece of sponge cake and some popcorn. He claimed to dislike the taste of the bean paste, but Clint was skeptical. He doubted that Matt had ever had it before. But he wasn't going to ask, because then Matt would tell him some awful tale about how the bean paste was contaminated with anthrax or something, and if Clint was going to die, he wanted to do it in blissful ignorance.

Tony had one of pretty much everything, in coffee flavour if it was available. And Clint loved coffee, so much, of course he did, but even he knew that not everything should be coffee flavoured.

 

It was kind of nice.

But there were more pressing matters.

 

“How are we getting home?” Clint asked.

“Oh, I called [Pepper] while I was [dragging] your [sorry asses] to land. She's sending [another] jet.”

Clint groaned. “You didn't think to tell us that?”

Tony paused. “I did. Oh, you probably didn't [hear] me.”

Clint kind of wanted to throw one of his rice and bean balls at him, but didn't want to waste it.

Instead he just sighed and shoved it in his mouth so he didn't say anything that would get him uninvited home.

 

* * *

 

“So you crashed in Japan, trespassed in the air and water space of a naval base, bought novelty socks, and enjoyed a number of Japanese desserts.”

Clint glanced at Tony. “Um, yeah. Is that a trick question?”

“No,” he growled. “Just clarifying what messes I have to clean up and which ones I can direct back at you.”

Clint winced, and Tony was probably calculating how much he'd owe Pepper after this. Matt looked nonplussed.

“You,” he pointed at Clint. “Get Stark to make you purple hearing aids that won't get wrecked by water or random lightning strikes. Wear them.” He pointed at Matt next. “You, stop flirting with Natasha indirectly.” Matt gaped at him. “Also, stop picking out clothes based solely on their feel. I saw your latest suit, you know, the actual suit, and it's god awful.” Finally, Fury turned his attention to Tony. “And you. Don't associate with other Avengers unless the world is ending. If you start, you'll probably cause the world to end. Got it?”

“Half of them live in my house,” he pointed out. “It's going to be kind of hard.”

“Then move out.”

“Counter offer,” Tony replied. “I don't go anywhere with these losers again, and I design the next quinjet for free.”

Fury grinned. “Deal.”

“Tony, as a lawyer, I'd like to tell you that you royally screwed that up, that I could have gotten you a better deal, and that was his intention all along.”

Tony considered that, all the while Fury was grinning at him. Clint was kind of freaked out a bit, if he was being honest. “Huh.”

“Too late,” Fury growled.

Tony shrugged. “I've had worse.”

Matt sighed, and Clint just glanced sideways at everyone. He would not be going on another trip with Tony if he could help it.

 

(Oh god, if only he knew what was to come.)

 

**Author's Note:**

> I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS ABOUT CLINT AND NATASHA NOT BEING ON AVENGERS MERCHANDISE. I'd like to think so does Thor.
> 
> Clint eats, in order, daifuku, anpan, castella, and melonpan.
> 
> And the reason Clint is so freaked out about what comes next is because it's a roadtrip. With everyone. It's my Marvel big bang, so look forward to that. Eventually.


End file.
